I LOVE YOU GOATSE!

What, you haven’t heard of them?  The conjoined twin sister singer-songwriter sensation?

Yeah, okay, so it’s just Amanda Palmer & Jason Webley dressed up as conjoined twins, but still fun, damn it! The story is actually really interesting.  Some might even call it disturbing.  They really get into the characters too, which makes it even more fun.

Anyway… we started out fairly bright and early (for us anyway) to drop the parrots off at the birdie hotel and go pick up a rental car.  I like driving rental cars over the mountains because I can punish those little engines in a way I wouldn’t Rick’s Honda.  HA!

Uneventful 4-ish hour ride.  Oh, I DID get a road-couch-cushion stuck to the front of the car for a few miles.  Had to actually pull over to set it free. That was fun.

We got into the bay area and I tried to find Emperor Norton’s grave… and failed miserably.  In retrospect, I know ALL the wrong turns I took and could probably find it if given another chance, but I wasted an hour driving around.  Just went to the motel at that point because it was getting late and I had to pee.

The motel was two blocks from the concert so we decided to just walk over.  Rick napped while I got ready and we headed out about 15 minutes before the doors opened.  Walked past the historic Mitchell Brothers O’Farrell Theater, a famous tittie bar with live lesbian sex shows where Hunter S. Thompson allegedly worked in the 70s. It was right next door to the concert venue. YAY!

Got in line at the Great American Music Hall (another historic place) & were ushered in shortly after. My friends came!  YAY!  It’s always cool to see Fox & Autumn, but this trip I actually got to meet Sierra!  And we all looked fanfuckingtabulous.

A bunch o’ Discordian hawtness right there, I tell ya!

The opener was a dude named Sxip Shirey.
Oh. My. God.

Honestly, I’m not much for opening bands, but when this man ran his harmonica through the distortion pedal and then bullhorned it… yeah, I was hooked.  TOTALLY love him!  I would honestly call him a modern day Spike Jones.

He also has really cool hair.

Then the twins came out and they were awesome.  They really played to the audience and gave a very enjoyable performance.  They skipped the whole child prostitution part of the story, though.  They did the first part of the story of the twins in lightshow puppets.  Very cool.

I love this picture:

After that we had some Jason Webley by himself and I was pleasantly surprised by his music.  Will definitely be putting him on the ‘pod.

After Jason,  AFP came out and her crazy ass fans all smooshed around into my personal table space and gave me dirty looks when I shot pictures over their shoulders.  Seriously -  love that woman… hate her fans.

Look at the cutest AFP picture ever!

It was a very good concert.

Afterward I thought about standing in line to get some Jason & Sxip stuff and possibly get another picture taken with Amanda Palmer just to piss Galen off, but I was so damn tired.  We ended up just wading through the homeless beggars and heading to the motel for bed.

Got up early-ish the next morning and went to see a dear old friend:

OMG YODA FOUNTAIN! I believe that Yoda was, indeed, life size.

Here’s the cutest picture ever of me & Rick:

We went in the lobby next.  It was like NerdMecca™.

Oh hay boys!

Of course we had to get our pictures taken with those guys.

The lobby was just a big old mess of nerd – all kinda of really cool/interesting books on the shelves, vintage Star Wars/Indiana Jones coffee table books on the tables, replica props all over, small bronzes & dolls of  Star Wars characters… I could have spent a long time just LOOKING.

We walked down the little hill and grabbed some $bux.  There’s a great view of the Palace of Fine Arts from just outside the ‘Bucks inside the Presidio.  I really want to go there sometime.  Oh hell, I just want to wander around the Presidio for a few hours.

We thought about going to Fisherman’s Wharf for some crab and going to Telegraph Hill to look for the cherry head conures, but we really had to be on the road in two hours if we wanted to get back to Reno to get the parrots before the birdie hotel closed.  So we headed to Japan Town instead to try the Korean restaurant there.

On the way there I drove up Webster street.  And when I say “up”, I mean “WAY THE FUCK UP”.  I swear the car was vertical a few times. Crazy ass rollercoaster street, I tell ya.  Seriously, an earthquake there would just tumble cars all the hell down the road.

Oh Japan Town, how I love thee!  Well, actually we just went to the little mall there, didn’t walk around because of time constraints.  After driving around there and trying to park, I can see where certain *cough* racial stereotypes *cough* about a certain demographic’s driving skills have their roots.  I’m sure it’s not universally true, but damn.  LOL.

Ichiban Kan  = love.  So much weird Engrish shit in there and weird snacks at really cheap prices.  I spent too much money on odd little things and, of course, got some more matcha!  For five dolla I got about as much as you can get at the Whole Paycheck for $25.  So nice.

These were taken after we got home, but this is some of my Japan Town haul:

Instant miso soup, green tea candy, matcha, matcha with some weird starch shit in it, rice candy and men’s Pocky.

Look at the cute little dishes & spoons I got for my instant miso!

Lunch time will make everyone happy.  Monotone lunch.  Slow and healthy time.
<3

We waved goodbye to San Francisco and got back on the road for an uneventful drive to Reno.  Then we got the so-happy-to-see-us birdies and went home.

The end.

There are more pics on my facebook.  If you haven’t added me as a friend there… you suck.

Quote:
KFC’s official caloric breakdown was performed by Silliker Inc., an internationally accredited nutrition lab, which published the following breakdown on the Double Down:

Sliced bacon (7.4 g) = 39.88 calories
2 Original Recipe fillets (192 g) = 335.62 calories

Colonel’s Special Sauce (0.5 oz.) = 73.67 calories

1 slice pepper Jack cheese (14 g) = 48.54 calories

1 slice Monterey Jack cheese (13 g) = 45.83 calories

Total: 543.54 calories

Rounded Label Data: 241 g = 540 calories

The CityRag.com breakdown:

2 Original Recipe fried chicken breasts = 720 calories, 42 grams of fat

2 1 oz. slices of cheese = 200 calories, 18 grams fat

2 servings of sauce = 200 calories, 20 grams fat

2 strips of bacon = 70 calories, 6 grams of fat

Total: 1,190 calories and 86 grams of fat

So, is the Double Down really only 540 calories? According to both sides, the answer is no. But the lab-certified ingredient list puts it at 543.54 calories, which is only 3.54 calories off — compared to the CityRag estimate, which is 646.46 calories off.

BUT!  No one has actually weighed/measured one of these bitches and posted the photographic evidence.  That’s where I come in.  Guess what I had for dinner tonight?

So here is my setup with my tasty tasty grilled Double Down and my kitchen scale.  I had asked for it without sauce for, while I like to think of myself as a saucy girl, I really don’t like wet sandwiches and the last one I had was a bit slippery for my taste.  Of course, we are talking about the fast food industry here, so they put sauce on it anyway.  Good for the calculations, I guess.

I decided to weigh each individual element of the “sandwich” and record the weights.  I wrote them down in ounces, but I’ll convert them to grams for the sake of continuity with the measurements above.  I’ll use calorieking.com to calculate calories, since it’s my favorite site for that kind of stuff.

The first chicken patty came in at almost exactly 3 ounces (keeping in mind that “exact” and “kitchen scale” aren’t really two words that should be used together) which would be about 85 grams.  85 delicious grams of KFC’s salty grilled chicken goodness.  Damn, I was hungry while I was doing this.

I placed the fillet face down after I weighed it, for I had decided to reverse assemble my dinner for nomming when the weighing was done.

Next came the bacon.  The bacon was very very disappointing.  Half an ounce (14.2g).  REALLY?  That’s like two miniature size pieces of bacon.  So sad.

Cheese is next.  Now, as an uber cheese aficionado, I can tell you that your average slice of cheese is usually about one ounce and 100 calories.  The TWO slices of cheese on this thing were about an ounce (we’ll say 29g).  Lame.  I guess CityRag wasn’t taking into account the skimpiness of fast food when they did their calculation.

It’s supposed to be one slice of pepper jack and one slice of regular jack.  It pretty much just looks like a saucy blob.

The last chicken fillet weighed in at just over three ounces, which we will call 87g.  That went face down on the pile and my dinner was sucessfully reassembled.

Now I had all my weights and the photographic evidence, and it was time to do some calculations:

• Two chicken breasts at 172 grams calculated using KFC’s values from Calorie King = 266 calories/8g fat
• 14.2 pitiful grams of bacon calculated as pan-fried (probably actually microwaved) = 77 calories/6g fat
• 29 grams of jack cheese calculated as “average all brands” = 112 calories/9g fat
  
• Special sauce from calculation above = 74calories (fat not given)
  TOTAL  = 529 calories & 23 grams of fat PLUS however much fat in the sauce

So, in conclusion, my grilled Double Down sandwich was 70 calories more than the nutritional information issued by KFC stated.  Or at least that’s what I estimate.

Honestly, there’s gotta be some kind of weirdness in the cheese that knocks off those calories.  Look at the nutritional analysis – that looks like it’s some weird lower calorie jack cheese there. My bacon weighed in at almost twice as much as the nutritional analysis bacon did.  Bob only knows how many extra grams of fat that damn sauce adds.  See, that’s another reason I don’t like sauces!  Except barbecue sauce.  On hot links.

But good god damn those things are tasty! Don’t let the way it looks fool you.  Do you REALLY need that nasty empty calorie white bread roll full of HFCS anyway to enjoy a pleasurable sandwich? No, you don’t.  Get messy, bitches!

They are very very salty, though.  So if you’re like me, expect a nice case of water retention bloat for a day or two.  But it’s worth it.

And yes, I nommed the HELL out of that thing when I was done!  And then…

I really enjoy making up new dishes and experimenting with spices and textures as well as cooking my “signature” dishes.  I enjoy reading as many recipes for a dish that I can find and then coming up with my own way of doing it.  That’s how I cook.

So, when people ask me for a recipe for something I make, I get a bit stumped.  I mean, I do a LOT of  this stuff on autopilot, I don’t write shit down or measure amounts.  I’m pretty good at eyeballing general measurements for calorie counting purposes, but it’s still pretty instinctive.

That’s why I’ve decided that I will share my recipes – but YOU will have to make them like I do and use your own instincts to get the best results.  HA!    Let’s begin, shall we?

CHOCOLATE PEANUT BUTTER BACON BALLS
(Yes, you read that right)

You will need:

• Peanut Butter
  (I suggest using Adams No-Stir – the texture is great and it is HFCS free with only peanuts, salt and oil in it.)
• Powdered Sugar
• Chocolate Bark (Coating chocolate)
• Bacon – extra crispy
  

Take 1-2 cups of peanut butter and dump it in a mixing bowl.  A cup of peanut butter should make about a dozen  balls, depending on how large you like them.

Start stirring in powdered sugar until your mixture is about the texture of cookie dough.

Crumble up your bacon really well and stir it in.  I use the microwave bacon and get it REALLY crisp so the fatty parts are crunchy.  You’ll probably want to use your hands at this point to make sure it’s all mixed in well.

How much bacon?  That’s up to you.  I like a LOT of bacon.  I think for the one cup of peanut butter I used 8 or 10 pieces. The dough will end up looking chunky/prickly if you do it like I do.

Okay – now your cookie dough texture will be a goopy greasy mess that you can’t mold.  Stick your bowl in the freezer for about 20 minutes. That will help the grease congeal and make it easier to form the mixture into balls.  If it’s still too greasy, stick it back in for a bit more.

Make your balls!  I guess use your own judgement as to how big you like your balls. (Did you see what I did there?) Put them on wax paper on a cookie tray and stick them in the fridge for like 20 minutes to chill them again before they get dipped.

While your balls are chilling, melt your chocolate bark.  Just follow the instructions on the package.  I use three chunks (Kroger brand) to cover 12 balls, but you can use more or less depending on your tastes.  Put it in a shallow wide-ish dish when it’s melted.

Roll your balls!  Roll them in the chocolate until they’re coated to your liking then scoop them out and put them back on the wax paper.  Use your fingers or a spoon, I don’t care. You can put any leftover chocolate on top of the balls if you want. Or just eat it. HA!

Chill your balls for around 20-30 minutes to harden the chocolate.

Nom the HELL out of them!

Okay, that’s my first recipe… maybe I’ll do some more eventually.

Isn’t he awesome?

Of course he is – since he’s our new bird!

This is Burt, an 8 year old Alexandrine.  They had it spelled “Bert” at the Parrot Connection, but I think we’re going to change the spelling.

So… I suppose I should tell the story of Burt and how  he ended up being our third psittacula.  But first!  Another picture!

Okay…

Today I ventured out to go to the Parrot Connection to grab some food and new toys for da boids. I walked in and grabbed the foods and was going to sit it on the counter and look at toys when I noticed Mark had an Alexandrine up on the perch on the counter.  I like to call it the “good bird perch” because that’s where Kirby gets to sit when they go to the bird hotel.  Of course I started talking to him right away and he said “HI” back to me.

Mark came out and told me he was cool with being handled, so I stepped him up.  He went to my shoulder and pressed his beak against my nose and started making kissing noises.  I was in love.  Mark mentioned his name was Burt and he was for sale.  He also said that some guy had wanted to buy him, but said he would be in first thing in the morning and hadn’t shown up yet (it was 2:30p).  Burt was mumbling something and kissing me and nodding his head the whole time.

I put Burt back on his stand and I took some pictures & sent one to Rick.  I finished my shopping, said hello to all the other store birds/boarders and then spent some time giving Blue Jeans the hyacinth macaw the neck scratches she demands.  LOL.  I checked out and went back to Burt. I seriously could not stay away from him – he’s just THAT awesome.

Rick got the picture and called me.  I told him all about Burt and how much he was.  Burt helped make his case by laughing into the phone while I was talking to Rick.  We decided to get him… and the guy who was buying him walked in.

This guy had brought his wife and two kids to see Burt and said he was going to let his wife decide.  The guy went to Burt to get him to step up and Burt pinned his eyes and ATTACKED the guy!  “Oh, they have to get used to you,” the guy says.  The wife went up to him and Burt lunged at HER too – eyes pinning!  I was still on the phone with Rick and went over by the food to tell him what happened.  I looked at Mark, kinda sad-like and he whispered “stick around a few minutes”.  So I told Rick I’d call him back.

I went over to Burt and told him it was okay and to calm down as I heard the guy saying “Well, it’s all up to the wife” to Mark.  The wife was over looking at the other birds.  Burt scooted over on the stand to me and pressed his giant beak against my nose.    I was seriously going to cry.

I talked to a cool girl there for awhile & showed her pictures of Busey and Kirby while Burt tried to eat her coffee lid and begged for walnuts.  (He was pretty friendly with her too, AND with Mark, so he must have HATED the other people.) I was getting sadder and I thought I should leave, so I left my number and asked them to call me.  “Wait two more minutes,” Mark said, “I don’t think they’re going to get him.”  So I waited.

I was trying not to be snoopy, but the guy came up to the counter and said something and I thought he said he was buying Burt.  I was very sad.  Then Mark said “Lisa!  You want that bird?” and the guy goes “He’s all yours!”  The wife had decided against the bird that attacked her!  BURT WAS OURS!

I called Rick back and we got him!

So… he’s gonna hang out with the birdies at the Parrot Connection until his cage gets here.  Rick hasn’t even met him yet, but I think that they will like each other a lot.  I mean, how can you NOT like this bird?

I’ve pretty much abandoned the livejournal – even let my paid account expire – and the twitter is pretty much just a LOOK AT ME thing that I enjoy reading occasionally to see what the celebrities I follow are saying.

It’s interesting how social medial is turning us into 140/420 character updaters and, at least in MY case, making us forget about writing in whole paragraphs.  Hell, the facebook even makes me use bad grammar by changing from third person to first person within posts.

We’ll see… year of the tiger, baby!  Or was that eye of the tiger?  I forget.

Yeah, I’ve abandoned my blog for the facebook.

So sad.

BUT…

I have a new baby!

LOOK AT MY BABY!

SO CUTE!

That’s my baby bike – a 2009 Honda Rebel.  I love her so much!

She’s little & I’m big, but we look good together.

Anyway… won’t you join me on the facebook?

Of course on the night of my wedding, THIS happened.

Yes, this IS the most awesome photo in the universe.

My husband took it.  LOL.

I blame the facebook.

Anyway…

Um…

I’m getting married on Halloween.

In Vegas.

And yes, it IS to Rick.

Email if you want to show up & need details.  It will be quick and fun and then PENN & TELLER!

Here are some t-shirts from the weeks I missed:

Evangelion

MEET THE FEEBLES!

EXTERMINATE!

Oh look…  it’s the Washoe County Courthouse!

That’s where you get the marriage license to go with the rings.