Xenobia dot net

Although NECA is a close second.

Just LOOK at this!

Pre-order here.

Locke and Hurley shall be mine!

Uncle Bob is selling stuff on eBay!

I just bought a random Erisian tarot reading from him. Will post the results here.
Seriously, go buy his stuff.
Robert Anton Wilson is probably my favorite non-fiction author and his books have made a lasting impression on my life.

NOOOOOOOOOOOO!
NOT MAJOR VICTORY!

Stupid teevee show.  Actually made me cry just a little bit.
But it’s okay because it made Stan Lee cry too.

Fucking Cyclops.
But Rick’s right – he is more of a Marvel type hero.

Today he was being an asshat and we were telling him to be good.
He flew up to the curtain rod and said his latest phrase that he just sprung on us last night:
“Pretty Bird!  Pretty Bird!  Pretty pretty pretty pretty!”

Yes, he knows exactly how to be really cute when he knows he’s annoying us.

I’ve come to the deduction that the bookstore is the equivalent of a singles bar for nerds. You go to the bookstore and hang out in your favorite section waiting for someone of your target gender to show up. Then you make nerd small talk and hope you get lucky and end up sharing a seat in the crappy cafe reading your shared interests.

I think the best time for this is probably the hour before the bookstore closes. Because I was hit on three times in less than a half hour tonight.

So, tonight I got a bug up my ass to read me some Preacher comics. It’s approximately ten at night.
I hop online and look up store hours. Score – Barnes & Noble is open until eleven!
I arrive at approximately 10:15 and head up the escalator to the graphic novels.
On my way up, comic book/furry guy with about 12 ear piercings cradling shiny silver Claire’s hoops makes a comment about how “lovely” and “stunning” my hair is. I thank him and carry on, thinking nothing of it.

I reach the graphic novels and ascertain that there are NO Preacher graphic novels in the damn store. But there is a lanky, scruffy, relatively attractive guy in the aisle. He, of course, immediately starts talking to me about comics. About how they’re all rehashed and boring. I notice he’s lovingly stroking the manga books while I’m in the traditional comics section. He begins, as all good Japanophiles do, to espouse the virtures of particular series as I make non-commital noises and throw out “I like Neon Genesis Evangelion and Cowboy Bebop”. This sets him off again, telling me the pros and cons of both series as he edges closer into my personal space bubble.
I’m saved when a mousy fat girl rounds the corner and attaches herself to him. Either she was with him, or thought she was because he clammed up kinda quick. I realized he was most likely a chubby chaser. I LOLed on the inside.
I continued to browse as they wandered off, but my manga hero was not to be denied! He snuck back and started up again! This time he was recommending things. I told him I would look into those, smiled and walked off.
I hid browsed in the fiction section for awhile until I noticed he was in the kids section with the fat girl. I grabbed a copy of Chuck’s book, Haunted, then went back down the escalator.

I can’t leave a bookstore without looking at the bargain books. I’m terribly afraid that I might miss something important for the low low price of $5.98 – $9.98. And there it was: Disinformation’s Everything You Know is Wrong for $9.98!
Of course there may be more, so I keep looking.
More came in the form of a spiky haired lesbian. Cute-ish, but not my type. She made small talk about looking for good bargain books then asked me what I was up to. I’m sure I made some wishy washy reply because she asked me if I wanted to go somewhere to read books. That must be smart lesbian slang for something. I said no, I had to get home to my cat and video games.

One last browse of magazines – looking for Layers, but only finding design mags that ran from $20-$40. WTF?
And there’s comic book/furry guy. Grinning at me.

He starts to make what I’m sure he though were awesomely witty comments to the bookstore staff while glancing at me to make sure I caught them and kind of shadows me as I act oblivious and make my way to the checkout. He breaks into some little schpiel about interpretive dance as I’m checking out. He’s directly across from me on the other side of the poop colored velvet rope and I just KNOW he’s gonna follow me to the car like a creepy stalker.
Luckily a clerk addressed him at that point and I snuck out fast.

I made it to the car as he was in the “between place” of the main entrance, looking after me. It was dark and I couldn’t see his face, but I’m sure it held a look of resignation that’s probably very comfortable there.

I peeled out of the parking lot with my 80s music blaring and the wind in my hair. Oh okay, not really, but it makes the story sound better.

On the short drive home I started forming this theory about the nerd pick-up spot. Seriously, it was last call at the bookstore on a Friday night.

I informed Rick that next time I go to the bookstore, he’s coming with me.

I’m actually toying with the idea of making this a real blog.  As opposed to just posting funny links.

Don’t get me wrong, there will always be funny links, but I’m thinking of actually moving into writing things.  You know, like articles and stuff. 

The question is:  What to write about?  I suppose I should just stick with my observations of the weird.  Maybe I’ll do some photo essay-ish posts.  No one reads this blog anyway, so I guess it doesn’t really matter. 
If I can ever figure out how to get the RSS feed working properly, I think I’m just going to abandon LiveJournal (except for reading friends) and tell people to add my feed to their friend list.  I guess I’ll take the time to do that this week.

And I think my first article will be about the Texas zombie dogs and the Maine “creature”.  Because that shit’s just fucked up right there.  It will take a bit of research to make a good write-up, so I’ll keep posting silly things in the meantime.

The job of the preacher is to bring fresh sperm!

Have you ever wanted a phone call from Samuel L. Jackson?

Well, you can give your friends and family just that!

As much as I like Fat Momma, I think I REALLY want to see a final showdown between The Tick and Cyclops.

And once again, I’m amazed by the fact that praise from Stan Lee makes people so emotional.

The Man, I tell ya.

So…
You know “Focus on the Family”, right?
Anti-abortion, anti-homosexual, anti-just-about-everything organization run by Dr. James Dobson?
Well, turns out they will send you crap off their website for FREE!
They suggest a donation amount. A donation, mind you.
But, as we all learned from Homer Simpson, a donation is not a price.

This article in The Stranger gives precise details on how to do this.

Remember, every package they send out for free is more money they have to spend on shipping and materials that CAN’T be used on their abhorrent forms of propaganda.

I can’t wait to read my new book and find out what the homosexual agenda REALLY is!